“Are you crazy!?”
“Better you then me!”
“How old are you again?”
“What do your other kids think?”
“Aren’t you worried about Down syndrome?”
“Oh lucky you, you have built in babysitters.”
* just a few of the comments we hear.
Upon first meeting my husband, the topic of having a baby was on the top of the list of things we discussed right away. He did not have any of his own and if you don’t/didn’t know, I have three from a previous marriage. Their ages are 17, 14 and almost 12 years old.
After some time we decided we would “try” to conceive, waiting each month to see if the lovely period came or not – or if the seldom late cycle resulted in a positive home pregnancy test (this happened five times and were all negative) or we were going to be blessed to have a child together.
In the meantime, the doctor appointments and check ups followed and we were advised to put our names on the fertility clinic’s list. It took us 10 months to get in to the fertility clinic.
We both underwent medical tests to make sure we could conceive a baby. He quit smoking, I gave up Pepsi and skittles and we tried our best to not think about it.
Meeting the specialist, the first thing he said was “Why are you NOT PREGNANT yet?” to which I replied, “Well that is why we are here sir.”
As I slightly sarcastically mentioned to the fertility doctor “Maybe my eggs are too old and are simply not cracking anymore?” He firmly replied, “Sadly, it’s true…your age is against you, time is against you – you have a 5 to 10 % chance of conceiving a child.”
Well thanks for the positive feedback doc.
We were completely bummed.
Then I thought, let’s just forget about it then and focus on us, wedding planning and not worry if I may or not be pregnant and remind ourselves, it must not be meant to be and carry on with our lives.
We were set to have a follow up apt. in three months with the fertility clinic.
My newlywed husband has always accepted my kids as his own and is a wonderful step-father to the kids.
Life went on.
We were engaged on July 20th, 2014 and were planning our wedding for July 4th, 2015.
Holidays were approaching and that time of year for my annual physical was too.
The most amazing part of this story, I love to share is the fact that I went in for a routine physical apt. during December. The first apt was a miscommunication of the time, so it was moved back a week, yeah three days before Christmas I get to have a pap test – every girls dream! Not.
A lump was found in my stomach so off I was sent for x-rays and blood work.
“Any chance you are pregnant?” asked the lab tech.
“Umm NO!” was my instant reaction.
The urine test was negative; proceed to x-rays, which is resulted in heading to Grande Prairie the next day for a ct scan (last minute shopping, yeah!) and a follow up back at the Fox Creek hospital on Boxing Day.
It was decided to book an ultrasound to check, as it appeared I had a cyst on my ovary.
January 19th was the date set.
Low and behold, my period the beginning of January was late and ultimately never arrived.
A Christmas wish, a miracle, you can call it what you want, but we were blessed and conceived a baby!
A doctor apt. confirmed yes I was pregnant and we were referred to attend the ultrasound already booked to confirm how far along I was. We were anticipating it to be a few weeks along and were told 7 weeks!
Due date – September 12th.
Now we are on our last week, waiting anxiously, slightly scared and overwhelmingly excited to meet our daughter or son.
We decided we would not find out what the gender of the baby was and its been a fun, yet struggling shopping experience, for us and our family.
We also want to encourage women and couples to share their stories. I quickly discovered that each one of us is going through something, and everyone could use an ear to listen to, a heart to understand and a shoulder to cry on.
Why are we secretive about this stuff? Yes, it’s personal and perhaps hard to share something so private; however, having the support of others, may just be what the doctor cannot order.
I wish for anyone going through fertility issues the best of luck, I wish them hope, patience and understanding and good health. If your dream is to have a baby, I hope your dream comes true!
“We cannot always control everything that happens to us in this life, but we can control how we respond. Many struggles come as problems and pressures that sometimes cause pain. Others come as temptations, trials and tribulations and blessings.” – Lionel Kendrick.
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